Two Truths and the Fact and What it Taught Me About Acting Out of Fear

I believe that every story has at least two truths and a fact. A story could have many more than two truths but, will always have one fact. 

Let me explain…

I was in India for a little over a month for a work / personal trip. This trip was by far the most influential, healing and enlightening trip I’ve ever had. (More about that in another blog!)

I arrived to India around midnight and closer to 2:00 AM to my Airbnb. 

As I arrived to the city of Gurgaon, I immediately noticed all of the stray dogs laying around and barking.

If you’ve ever been to India, this is totally normal. Stray dogs are everywhere! I’ve actually noticed that, a lot of countries with high poverty has an abundance of stray dogs. I think it’s because when you can’t feed yourself, pets are the first to suffer and get left behind. 

The first encounter

Days later I was jogging home from a Yoga class when I  heard a dog running up and barking at me. Getting ready to attack!

My first instinct, luckily, was to turn to the dog, stand my ground and SHUSH at it. 

I guess watching all those episodes of Cesar Milan paid off as I naturally did the right thing! 

The dog backed off but I could tell from the look she gave me, this wouldn’t be the last time we crossed paths. 

I didn’t think too much of the dog or the encounter afterwords but, I then noticed signs around the neighborhood which warned people to be careful with the stray dogs. I guess running around puts dogs in an alert mode and will entice them to attack. 

Good to know!

The second encounter with Susie

A day or two after I was walking home from work when again, I hear Susie, (It’s the name I gave here) growling and approaching me slowly this time.

I thought, like last time, I would just SHUSH her and she would back off and that would be the end of it. But, it wasn’t the case. Susie kept getting closer. 

I could feel my body naturally going into “defense” mode and preparing itself against anything that could happen. My mind started to race, imagining the all the scenarios where Susie jumped at me. I was mentally preparing myself to stop the attack as I visualize the possibilities. 

Throughout all of this I kept telling myself:

“I don’t want to hurt Susie”. Nor did I want Susie to hurt me!

I tried as best as I could to keep my cool while standing my ground as I continued to SHUSH her away. 

I was able to get past without any contact with Susie, but this time, I had a bit of fear that one of these days, Susie and I would have an encounter that won’t go down well.

Again, I wanted to avoid at all cost for this to happen. Some of the neighbors recommended I throw a rock at her. But again, I did not want to treat this with violence. I had seen a neighbor throw a rock at a dog earlier in the week and it broke my heart. 

I had no idea why this dog was so angry towards me. I thought maybe, she was just a crazy stray dog with a harsh upbringing and this is why she was so aggressive. Maybe others had thrown rocks at her and this is why she was so defensive. My mind went into a handful of reasons as to why Susie was like this. But it wasn’t until the third encounter that made me see the reason for Susie’s attitude. 

Understanding Susie’s anger

On the third encounter I was getting annoyed. I wanted to be able to walk too and from work peacefully.

Susie was pissing me off.

I was running out of ideas and picking up a rock was becoming more real than I could imagine. Maybe I could just pretend throw a rock to scare her.

It went against my beliefs and how I wanted to treat the situation. Specially since anger and aggression was one of the things I had set out to work on over the course of this trip. I then noticed something. 

Susie had a friend. I saw another dog laying behind her this time. The dog seem scared, in pain and unable to walk.

I wasn’t able to notice this dog before as there was a mound of sand that had been slowly disappearing as construction workers used it to mix with cement. 

Susie had nothing against me. She was just protecting her friend that was hurt, vulnerable and defenseless.

The two truths and the fact of the story

This whole time my truth was that a crazy, aggressive, pissed off dog, had nothing better to do than to bother the neighbors. I told friends and coworkers about this crazy dog and how annoying she was.

The neighbors truth was that this was a normal thing in India and to treat fire with fire. Throw a rock, kick the dog or even worse, set poison out for it to eat.

But the fact is that Susie was just protecting her vulnerable friend. She probably had no desire to fight. 

There are probably other truths around the story, like a neighbor who knew Susie’s situation and thought I was the aggressor. Or someone who never saw the dog and thought I was just a crazy person SHUSHING in the streets! 

Think of it this way…

For all stories there can be many truths, but always, one fact. The hard part is knowing how close your perspective or story is to the fact.

This taught me a valuable lesson. 

Who wants to just fight for the sake of it?

No one does.

There is a reason behind every action. Human or animal, 99% of the time, no one is out to get you. If someone has a mental illness, it’s the mental illness blurring their minds to do these things, not them. No one in their right mind is wanting to hurt another person or being. 

Our minds are wired in a way to keep us alive, to protect us. Thoughts of pure defense come easy. Understanding the whole picture and getting to the fact, is the hard part.

What I learned from this experience is to never be lazy with my thought process and therefore to never act on the first reaction, specially if the first reaction is out of fear or anger. 

As humans, we need to use our intellect to be mindful and couscous in moments like this to see the facts. Explore our story or perspective to figure out how close it’s to the fact. 

I could have listened to the neighbors and gone straight to aggression.

There was a chance it would have worked. Susie would have been hurt and gone elsewhere. Or maybe it would have made it worse, and the following encounter I would have found myself against a pack of dogs ready to come after me.

Either way, anger is never the right choice.

I can look back to countless scenarios similar to this. Scenarios where I assumed the bad before even thinking much about the “Why”. 

In all, I vow to practice deep breathing, mindfulness and consciousness in harsh situation, to help me stay calm, to always think and act out of love and never to react from fear or anger. I hope to have the patience to explore my perspective and to get as close to the fact as possible.

What happened to Susie? I cooked some boneless chicken and left it out for her and her friend to eat.

Will we ever become friends? 

I don’t know…

… but I am no longer bothered on my way to or from work. 

Thank you for reading, I hope this can inspire others to be conscious and to think and react out of love and not anger or fear.